Same old day by Emily

He was so lonely. Sam- who was a 12 year old boy- was sitting under the shade of his favourite willow tree in his favourite park. The sky was grey and miserable as usual. Sam knew what he did every day and it was never different: he would wake up in his hyena themed bedroom; go downstairs for breakfast; drag himself upstairs to his bedroom; wash and dress; then walk to the park and climb to his special place for a sandwich. He lived far from where all his friends did so he always did it alone. It never changed.

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4 thoughts on “Same old day by Emily

  1. Anonymous says:

    That Is a fantastic story. Good work on fitting all five words in:sandwich, climb, miserable,grey and hyena. You have done really well on 100 words
    Aimée

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  2. Mrs W says:

    Hi Emily. What a sad story. I really felt for Sam. You obviously chose your words to express his sadness and loneliness very clearly. I would ask you to take another look at your use of punctuation. Instead of the dashes in the second sentence, parenthetic commas would have been better. You have also used a semi colon, where it is more appropriate to use a comma as you are simply listing events in a sequence. Keep writing. You have excellent ideas and style. The way you ended on a short sentence was fantastic.
    Mrs W (Team 100 Australia)

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  3. Michael says:

    Cool story Emily !!!

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  4. Caitlyn says:

    Great story Emily!!!!!!!!!

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